Busy in German

A sign of life after some while. I've been busy driving the CST Change Support Business during the last couple of months. Most of that stuff is done in German. If you're interested in reading about Management-Diagnostics and the validity of our Management Profiling approach in German, follow these links:

"Management-Diagnostik: Identifizieren wir die Richtigen?" http://sn.im/mp_v.pdf

CST Führungs-Update mit dem Thema 'Management Profiling' http://sn.im/fu_mp_12_01

Please get in touch for information on CST contribution to your leadership performance.

Tablet Computing - The Book of Jobs

Tablet computing

The book of Jobs

It has revolutionised one industry after another. Now Apple hopes to transform three at once

Jan 28th 2010 | From The Economist print edition

Illustration by Jon Berkeley

APPLE is regularly voted the most innovative company in the world, but its inventiveness takes a particular form. Rather than developing entirely new product categories, it excels at taking existing, half-baked ideas and showing the rest of the world how to do them properly. Under its mercurial and visionary boss, Steve Jobs, it has already done this three times. In 1984 Apple ...

http://www.economist.com/opinion/displayStory.cfm?story_id=15393377&source=hptextfeature

The world is flat ...

Finally someone has explained one of the most frequently mis-cited academic works in communication. Here's a link for your own reference: http://www.kaaj.com/psych/

Obituary for a fish named Benson ("The Economist")

Benson, England’s best-loved fish, died on July 29th, aged about 25

Aug 13th 2009 From The Economist print edition

PETERBOROUGH, in the English Midlands, is a red-brick town, best known as the midway point on the line between King’s Cross and York. But from the bottom of Kingfisher Lake, just outside it, urban toil seems far away. There, all is most delightful silt and slime. A push of your probing nose sends up puffs and clouds of fine mud through the water. A riff of bubbles rises, silvery, towards the surface. The green reeds quiver, and sunlight ripples down almost to the depths where you are lurking, plump and still.

Such was mostly the life, and such was the address, of Benson, England’s most famous fish. Her actual place of birth, as a wriggling, transparent fry prey to every frog, pike and heron, was never known. But at ten, when she was stocked in Kingfisher, she was already a bruiser. And there, among the willow-shaded banks, she grew. And grew. At her peak weight, in 2006, she was 64lb 2oz (29kg), and was almost circular, like a puffed-up plaice. Bigger carp have been seen in Thailand and in France; but she still amounted to a lot of gefilte fish.

Read the whole story here: Benson | The Economist

Leave your Wifi open to all

I'm not quite sure how to handle this suggestion from an internet style guide (in German): http://www.zeit.de/online/2009/32/bg-internet-knigge?9

What I do have is another suggestion. I named my wifi with an email address, so that anyone who sees it can send me an email and ask to access it. In the last 24 months no requests were received. This does sort of indicate a lack of demand, doesn't it?

Anyhow, it does cater for "reciprocal altruism", because at least I know who is benefiting from my altruism.

Now, I did once have a landlord, whose son worked at JUNGvMATT and I am regularly at the Sparkassenakademie in Bonn with trainings for participants of the MBA programme, but I never expected this honour. Thanks to all contributors!

Especially if you consider that the man depicted is effectively lost!

The picture is of Asians waiting at the arrival gate. Asians are known for having difficulty in pronouncing the letter "R", which becomes "L", rendering the man arriving at the airport as "Mr Lost". It never bothered me, when dealing in the Far East, but somehow I can not see how this would work in the ad?

By the way, does anyone know who this perpetrating Mr Huebner is?

Promises, Trust and Forward Looking Statements

Early on a Sunday morning I have been contemplating current economic and political developments and have come to an important conclusion. I have decided to pass on in writing, to anyone I communicate with, a dicslosure statement referring to any  'forward looking statement'. 

Aren't those called 'promises' in real life? 

A declaration or an assurance that one will do a particular thing or that guarantees that a particular thing will happen.

I strongly urge you to include the following statement in the footer of any email you submit to anyone, especially if they contain personal promises of any sorts, not covered by your personal indemnity insurance ;-)

Disclosure on Promises

Some of the information in this email may contain projections or other forward-looking statements regarding future events or the future performance of (your name). 

(your name)  wishes to caution you that these statements are only predictions and that actual events or results may differ materially. You are referred to all and any comments, oral and written in emails that (your name) has submitted from time to time. These documents and statements contain and identify important factors that could cause the actual results to differ materially from those contained in his promises or forward-looking statements, including, among others, changes in the demand for (your name); changes in economic conditions generally or technology spending in particular; changes in the competitive dynamics of (your name)’s markets, including alliances and consolidation among his competitors or partners; deterioration of (your name)'s relationships with existing and new partners, and (your name)'s inability to compete effectively in an increasingly competitive market. 
(your name) assumes no obligation, and does not intend, to update his promises.

Heaven ... on a Saturday afternoon

Heaven ... is an afternoon of bliss, after a visit to the English shop and a purchase of happiness: cream scones mix and clotted cream ;-)

If you want the enjoyment, this is all you'll need, enjoy:

http://www.english-shop.de
Introduction to scones

21 Reasons Why the English Language is hard to learn

1) The bandage was wound around the wound.

2) The farm was used to produce produce.

3) The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse.

4) We must polish the Polish furniture.

5) He could lead if he would get the lead out.

6) The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert.

7) Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present.

8) A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum.

9) When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.

10) I did not object to the object.

11) The insurance was invalid for the invalid.

12) There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row.

13) They were too close to the door to close it.

14) The buck does funny things when the does are present.

15) A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewer line.

16) To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.

17) The wind was too strong to wind the sail.

18) After a number of injections my jaw got number.

19) Upon seeing the tear in the painting I shed a tear.

20) I had to subject the subject to a series of tests.

21) How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend.

Ideas worth spreading

About this talk

In an exclusive preview of his book The Stuff of Thought, Steven Pinker looks at language and how it expresses what goes on in our minds -- and how the words we choose communicate much more than we realize.

Marvelous Philipp Lahm is Superhero

"It was always going to take something special to eliminate Turkey, like one of those movie monsters that can be killed only by a stake through the heart, or a silver bullet. It was going to need a savage plot twist, perhaps, or a ruthless hero, coldly determined to meet his destiny for the cause. Somehow, because this is what they do in big football tournaments, the Germans found such a man, and such a narrative, at St Jakob-Park last night ... Philipp Lahm ..."


Thanks Martin Samuel, Chief Football Correspondent, The Times. Read the full article here.

This must be good

This I must share with you, a description of an internet radio station:

"Die coolste, modernste Klangwelt für den urbanen Nomaden. Dieser Sound ist immer positiv, uplifting und bright. Ohne Moderation können Sie damit durch den Tag gleiten."

In fact, that's exactly what I'm looking for at 6.30 in the morning, something "uplifting und bright".

The point made here is, language is certainly not static, it develops, grows and flourishes in its natural environment.

Linguistic Congruence within the European Union

1. Due to its widespread use on the so-called 'Information Superhighway', and so that growing anti-European sentiments in Britain may be reassured about the importance of Britain's role in the European Union, the European Parliament has taken the unprecedented step of selecting one language - English - to become the preferred common language of the European Union.

2. In order to expedite this process and to speed congruence, the European Parliament has commissioned a feasability study of ways in which communications between departments of member governments can be made more effective. Its main recommendations are summarised below.

3. European officials have often pointed out that English spelling is unnecessarily complicated and illogical - for example, the different sounds of cough, plough and rough, or heard and beard. There is a clear need for a phased programme of changes to eliminate these anomalies. The programme would, of course, require administration by a committee whose members would be supplied by participating nations.

4. During the first year of implementation, it is envisaged that the soft "c" will be replaced by the more phonetically correct letter "s". This will sertainly be resieved favourably by sivil servants in many European sities, and will insidentally render the "i" before "e" exsept after "c" rule unnesessary. The logical replasement of the hard "c" by the letter "k" will follow, due to the similarity in pronunsiation. This konkomitant step will, insidentally, not only klear up konfusion in the minds of klerikal workers, but also klarify word prosessing sinse it kompletely removes the need for one of the letters on the keyboard.

5. The sekond stage will see the digraph "ph" written as "f". In addition to the fonetik logik of this move, words such as "fotograf" will be twenty per sent shorter.

6. The third fase will involve the removal of double letters in words. In many instanses, double leters do not afekt the aktual pronunsiation of a word. They are, however, a comon deterent to akurate speling.

7. The fourth element will be the elimination of silent "e"s from the languag. Thes ar often stal reliks of past spelings. They do litl to enhans writen English and it is antisipated that they kould be droped with eas.

8. By this point, the Komision antisipats that publik akseptans of the changes will be at a high level. It wil thus be posibl to promot som other, smaler, but stil posibly kontentious, changes. For exampl, the unesesary "o" kan be droped from words kontaining the "ou" digraf. A similar proses kuld then be aplid to other vowel and konsonant kombinashuns.

9. However, no konseshun wuld yet hav ben mad to Uropean sensibilitis. To tak kar of som of the komon difikultis enkountered by non-nativ spekers, it wuld be sensibl for the "th" digraf to be replased by "z". Ze funkshun of ze "w" kan zen be taken by ze letter "v", vich is, of kors, half a "w" in any kas.

10. Zis proses vil kontinu, in a kumulativ fashun. Eventuli English vil be ze komon languag ov ze Komuniti, vich vil no longer be merly an ekonomik sifer, but a kominashun ov fre pepls. Ve shal kontinu to red and rit as zo nuzing has hapend. Evrivun vil no vot ze uzer sitizens ar saying and komunkashun vil be mutch ezier. Ze Komuniti vil hav achevd its objektivs ov congrewents and ze drems ov ze pepls of Urop vil finali hav kum tru. It is hopd zat zes signifikant konseshuns vil finaly reashor ze "Uroskeptiks"!

Why did the chicken cross the road?

Buddha:
Asking this question denies your own chicken nature.

Colonel Sanders:
Damn, I missed one!

Anderson Consulting:
Deregulation of the chicken's side of the road was threatening its dominant market position.

The chicken was faced with significant challenges to create and develop the competencies required for the newly competitive market. Andersen Consulting, in a partnering relationship with the client, helped the chicken by rethinking its physical distribution strategy and implementation processes.

Using the Poultry Integration Model (PIM), Andersen helped the chicken use its skills, methodologies, knowledge, capital and experiences to align the chicken's people, processes and technology in support of its overall strategy within a Program Management framework.

Andersen Consulting convened a diverse cross-spectrum of road analysts and best chickens along with Anderson consultants with deep skills in the transportation industry to engage in a two-day itinerary of meetings in order to leverage their personal knowledge capital, both tacit and explicit, and to enable them to synergize with each other in order to achieve the implicit goals of delivering and successfully architecting and implementing an enterprise-wide value framework across the continuum of poultry cross-median processes.

The meeting was held in a park-like setting, enabling and creating an impactful environment which was strategically based, industry-focused, and built upon a consistent, clear, and unified market message and aligned with the chicken's mission, vision, and core values. This was conducive towards the creation of a total business integration solution.

Andersen Consulting helped the chicken change to become more successful.

***

... fly me to the moon ...

Feed the World and learn English

It's that time of the year ... again!

It's that reflective time of the year, when we assess our priorities, set goals, and make wishes for our family and friends. I would like to pass on to a collection of suggestions for the upcoming 2008:

• Understand work/life balance and adopt one activity that is unrelated to the office. Driven leaders get energized from work and often find it fun, but it is equally important to discover something away from your desk that excites you.

• Find new ways to keep your team connected and motivated. Competition can be good, but celebrating each other's successes is better. Create interdependence and strong working relationships and the power of many will be greater than the will of one.

• Mourn the loss but learn the lessons. The mistakes that cost you the big deal can be fuel to help land the next one.

• Strengthen your empathy muscles. Understanding the perspective of a family member, customer, employee, boss or colleague will bring you untold rewards.

• Measure the stress against "how important is it?" Never forget that health, love, compassion and joy come before money, power and prestige.

Thank you and may 2008 bring happiness and peace to you and your loved ones.

Vita est Laborem: Procrastination revisited

Have you ever managed to find the time to visit a seminar on time-management? Have you found an empty space in your life which you filled with reading a book on a similar subject? Please, please, please let me know that it was not worth its while, just for my comfort ;-) Until then I can only agree with my good old mate Father Guido Sarducci: Life is a job!



You may possible be looking for a review on the mini challenge weekend, after all it was announced with the last post some weeks ago. Stand by; I will post something on that eventually.

Did you notice who left a comment on my last post on preference reversal? I am thrilled! Someone claiming to be ‘the man of procrastination’ himself: the right honourable Prof. Piers Steel. Wow! To all the hoaxers out their, just let me continue to believe that.

Here’s the valuable part of today’s blog. I am reading a book, once again recommended to me by my dad, he’s my personal literature critic: ‘Instead of wasting your time with what you would normally be doing, read this.’ ;-)

You will have to stick around to find out more on the book, because I intend to share some of the delightful vocabulary and writing styles with you. To make it just a ‘little’ challenge to you, OK call it a ‘mini’ challenge if you wish, here’s my contest: The first person to post the title of the book with the author’s name in a comment to this blog will receive a complementary issue from me. Go for it!

Here’s the vocabulary for today:

‘These vicarious second-order believers are often more zealous than the real thing, …’

vicarious
/vikairi ss/
• adjective 1 experienced in the imagination through the feelings or actions of another person. 2 acting or done for another.
- DERIVATIVES vicariously adverb.
- ORIGIN from Latin vicarius ‘substitute’.

zealous
/zell ss/
• adjective having or showing zeal.
— DERIVATIVES zealously adverb zealousness noun.

zeal
/zeel/
• noun great energy or enthusiasm for a cause or objective.
— ORIGIN Greek zelos.


***

"Preference Reversal"

In scientific terms, a person's intention alone is not enough to see anything through - a condition called preference reversal.

In his article about procrastination Professor Piers Steel from the University of Calgary said that putting things off continuously can be blamed on three basic human traits: confidence, values and impulsiveness.

It's off to Munich and Salzburg this weekend, no longer giving in to procrastination, but rather some impulsive accelleration at the Salzburgring featuring the final heat of the Mini Challenge live 2007 . That’s the 210 horsepower thing on the right side of the reversal visualisation guys!


I’ll let you know how it was and maybe you’ll check your ‘E x V / (Gamma) x D’ in terms of getting me my first response on this blog effort.

***

English for Runaways #273

The misuse of “I” and “myself” for “me” is caused by nervousness about “me.” Educated people know that “Jim and me is goin’ down to slop the hogs,” is not elegant speech, not “correct.” It should be “Jim and I” because if I were slopping the hogs alone I would never say “Me is going. . . .” If you refer to yourself first, the same rule applies: It’s not “Me and Jim are going” but “I and Jim are going.”

So far so good. But the notion that there is something wrong with “me” leads people to overcorrect and avoid it where it is perfectly appropriate. People will say “The document had to be signed by both Susan and I” when the correct statement would be, “The document had to be signed by both Susan and me.” Trying even harder to avoid the lowly “me,” many people will substitute “myself,” as in “The suspect uttered epithets at Officer O’Leary and myself.”

“Myself” is no better than “I” as an object. “Myself” is not a sort of all-purpose intensive form of “me” or “I.” Use “myself” only when you have used “I” earlier in the same sentence: “I am not particularly fond of goat cheese myself.” “I kept half the loot for myself.” All this confusion can easily be avoided if you just remove the second party from the sentences where you feel tempted to use “myself” as an object or feel nervous about “me.” You wouldn’t say, “The IRS sent the refund check to I,” so you shouldn’t say “The IRS sent the refund check to my wife and I” either. And you shouldn’t say “to my wife and myself.” The only correct way to say this is, “The IRS sent the refund check to my wife and me.” Still sounds too casual? Get over it.

On a related point, those who continue to announce “It is I” have traditional grammatical correctness on their side, but they are vastly outnumbered by those who proudly boast “it’s me!” There’s not much that can be done about this now. Similarly, if a caller asks for Susan and Susan answers “This is she,” her somewhat antiquated correctness is likely to startle the questioner into confusion.

More errors from Paul Brians can be found here

***